Linda, “As parents, present a united front to your kids. Hash out your differences behind the scenes. Don’t let children ever see a divide. They will exploit the tiniest tear without mercy!” Tip 4
A united front, Linda’ Tip #4, has been a key component of our parenting. I never understood parents who played against each other, or the good cop/bad cop approach. To me, it just makes twice the work! I was trying my best to simplify things.
Of course, Big Mike and I did not always agree. Regardless, we would never let Michael see dissension. We too, would carry all disagreements behind the scenes. Luckily for us, our philosophies were generally the same. Also, luckily, Mike Sr.was willing to learn, listen, compromise, and often defer to me. ☺
I’m so thankful we upheld this approach. I think it provided security to Michael, and saved him from having to manipulate and/or work around one or the other. This approach saved us all time and heartache.
I can’t imagine parenting from two different sets of values and beliefs. I’m not sure how a marriage can hold up with extreme and contrasting parenting views.
I wouldn’t begin to offer advice on working with opposing views; however, I do strongly believe any opposition should be kept between adults. Kids do not need the confusion caused when they see their parents disagree, or the uncertainty.
We were kind of like a couple of ducks, smooth on the surface, but paddling like hell underneath. Parents have an obligation to do all they can to keep things going smoothly.
Thanks Linda! In our short time together you’ve been a solid, and unforgettable mentor to me. Thank you also for raising a great friend for my son, and for the two fine men proudly reflecting all you are, and all your union represents!