25 of 100 Dads – Tenderness

Jay is a virtual friend of mine who shares my love for Tony Robbins, and of fire walking. It is immediately clear, at the introduction, Jay has a superior zest for life, achievement and family. He is ambitious and accomplished.

This father of three is a self described performing artist, curious thinker, educator, board member and solution finder. Jay states the most important foundation of his parenting is his goal to “break the cycle of generational brokenness.”

We do have a lot in common!

Jay confides that men in his life have abandoned their responsibilities, on both sides of his family tree. With such a history, he’s felt insecure as to exactly how to be a Dad. He appreciates the opportunity to establish a new meaning of family, a loving legacy one of paternal leadership.

He shared feelings of inadequacy, impatience, high expectations and lack of a tender approach. Having made tremendous progress, Jay values the importance of sharing fears, process and outcomes.

Jay, “Be tender.Tip 3

As many of us know, the world is not such a “tender” place. To those who us that feel differently, that’s great! I wish you continued tenderness.

As for me, the thought of being raised by a Dad who valued tenderness, well – I can’t imagine. I can’t imagine but I’ve tried.

It is wonderful that this man is raising three children. What a future they will have with a foundation of tenderness.

Having grown up in the absence of tenderness, I can’t help but ponder what a comfort tenderness would have been. A tender Dad would have unquestionably been a welcomed and life changing experience. The world would have been completely different; today would have been completely different.

This tip also made me question as to if I, as a Mom, demonstrated tenderness. I can’t honestly say I was tender. I was loving, busy, hardworking, well-meaning, frantic, but tender, I’m not sure.

I’m confident, tenderness would be a quality appreciated at any age.  I will aspire to be more mindful of it. I will do what I can to incorporate a tender approach as I continue to reach higher with my next generation.

Thanks Jay, for each of your points and to your dedication to family and personal growth.

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